I jus realized i haven't posted for like a week!! is that very long? it seems super long to me. i didn't noe so many things can happen in a week. got back a few of my common test papers. chinese, geography...got back science today. there's still english, literature, maths and next week it's DnT. then i'm....FREE!!! as free as a little bird!! woohhoooo!!!!! i wanna watch movies--HAIRSPRAY, RATaTOOiULLE, No Reservations, i wanna watch it 3 times, with 3 different group of frens, i wanna sleep at 6pm, i wanna eat chocolates and go high everyday!!!! i wanna play barbie dolls with my sisters, i wanna go swimming three days a week, i wanna tap again, i wanna call and talk to my best fren for 2 hours everyday, i wanna go shopping with my mum almost every weekend, i wanna know every single person in the school, i wanna i wanna i wanna have my LIFE back!!! actually i don't really noe where all of that came from. it jus spurt out of me like fireworks. maybe i miss myself too much. i've been studying too much. sometimes, when u study alot, you suddenly feel as if you have lost yourself and can't find the reason why. it's like a poison, seeping into you, first into your blood. then your hair will start dropping. then into your brain....you'll start crying. slowly and painfully, it'll reach into your heart, and pierce right into it like some sword you can't pull out. you'll feel this excruciating pain where you have lost yourself. 失去自我。you don't know what happened to you these few weeks (when the poison was attacking you), you jus noe you feel sick and tired and life to you isn't all that meaningful after all. maybe i'm going bonkers, i'm not really a stress person, i really can't do big things in life. i think when i grow up i need to have a job without deadlines and allows me to work at my own pace. but i think working at my own pace doesn't really suit me too. i'm so CoNtRADicTing!!! ahhhhh. what is wrong with me?? the best is not to have a job and marry a rich husband. hahahha. after you cheat him of all his wealth, you get a divorce. then i won't have to work for the rest of my life!! whoa. i'm such a great life planner. i've got the rest of my life worked out. i should be a financial planner. but all my advices will be the same, won't they? Marry a rich husband!! heheheheh. this is jus a materialistic side of me, and in the actual sane side of me, i don't really approve of that thinking. i'd rather pull all my hair out but earn my own money, and however little the money is, i won't depend on others. except maybe my parents. hahaha. gosh. this post is full of crap.Labels: normal days
got me singing like, nananana everyday, 8:22 PM.
